Ali Wong: Prostitute Problems

First, I want to say that Ali Wong is really funny and pretty and I’m glad she exists. In the oeuvre of comedy, she certainly has her place. I like her and if she were around, I think we’d be friends. That being said, she has, what I call, "prostitute problems". She subscribes to the mentality I call “Prostitute Power”, wherein a woman acts proud that she is a "prostitute". Now, there is nothing wrong with having robust sexuality and celebrating it openly. But does Ali Wong really celebrate her sexuality? Is she suggesting that you should be like her, that she is a role model? I’d argue no. She even says that “any man listening to [her] and thinking I want to fuck her is a raging psychopath.” Ali says that after getting married and having two kids she actually just wants to “be on [her] own”. She says that there is “no reward for being a female stand-up comic besides danger and punishment.” She also says that she has a career and a husband and a family and she still wants more.

I believe Ali is suffering from the cognitive dissonance that comes with the “Prostitute Power” mentality that keeps the sex salve trade going. That is why she is so unhappy. Her thoughts about sex, relationships, and motherhood all conflict and contribute to the human trafficking problem. In short, she believes relationships are a game, sex is selfish, and motherhood is the ultimate trap, for both partners. This is how a prostitute thinks. And thinking like that perpetuates not only that mentality and prostitution in general, but it props up the magic needed for the sex slave trade to even exist. You see, much of magic is about "anchoring mirrors". Setting things up over here that reflect and propagate what is happening over there. When Ali talks proudly about fucking a million guys, she makes it possible for the sex slave trade to exist by acting like a sex slave herself. She has fallen into the trap of the Famous Sex Slave, like Britney Spears, Kim Kardashian, and Lindsey Lohan. It’s not her fault: it’s the programming created by the Freemasons/Illluminati/New World Order. I was a prostitute mirror for many years and have only recently begun to recover from it. So, in essence, do not blame Ali Wong for her fucked up views; just notice them and avoid them if you can.

Let’s talk for a moment about how Ali feels about herself. She describes herself as “sick”, a “horrible person”, a “pervert”, a “gross, filthy animal” and a “piece of shit”. She says that there are times when she feels “down, ugly and no good”. She says that she is “barely rising to the occasion” of motherhood. She says that she wants to cheat on her husband but hasn’t yet, not because she’s a good person, but because a worthy opportunity has yet to present itself. Now, doesn’t this sound like how a prostitute would think of themselves? Doesn’t this sound like how every woman with prostitute power mentality thinks of herself? Some women act so proud of their promiscuity, but in reality, it just leaves them feeling cheap and empty, and I know this from my own experience. Ali says that she has a family and a career and it’s not enough. She wants more. This is the empty feeling I’m talking about. When a “prostitute” gets married and has kids and has a career, it all based on bullshit. The marriage is fake, the kids are a burden, and the career is embarrassing. I think it's fair to say that Ali is not dealing with her shame properly. I know this because in Don Wong she speaks about her colon being completely backed up with shit. Shit represents shame. She didn’t shit for 6 weeks. 6 is the number of sex, so her shame is primarily about her sex life. Ali is not dealing with her sexual shame. Although Ali overcompensates for her lurid, crass comedy by having great posture, deep inside of herself, she’s ashamed.

One thing Ali is ashamed of is that she has an STD. She has HPV and says that if you don’t have it, you’re a loser and you will have it soon. She has also fucked two homeless men, started watching porn at an early age, and the most romantic thing she thinks any man has every said to her is “let’s make a fucking mess” when she told him she was on her period. She was very sexually active in her twenties and says her pussy is stretched out because of it. She also says her pussy is “gone”, emotionally and spiritually. This is prostitute shit. She gets turned on by the fear men feel of being gay when she stimulates their prostate; she gets turned on by abuse, saying that her greatest fantasy during Hard Knock Wife is to be called a simple hoe, because she wants to imagine she is an illiterate farm girl with no responsibility or decision-making power. She says she likes it when men “come in real slow and soft and tenderoni in the beginning and then get real rapey by the end.” She says that “in the last 30 seconds [of sex], put [her] in a headlock and say racist shit to [her]. Degrade [her] until [she] is deaf and mute at the same time.” Now this is real sex slave shit, my friends. This sounds like she gets off to BEING a sex slave. Which is powerful magic to keep those girls in enslavement. If you cum to someone raping you and making you deaf and dumb then you’re propagating that scenario for those women. She says that when she felt her coworker's penis get hard against her back one time, she didn’t feel violated, she felt victorious. This is not in and of itself a bad thing, but given what we know about Ali, it is all just more prostitute problems. Like she says, “all [her] underwear looks like it's been snacked on by rats.” Yeah, Freemason rats, brainwashing her and giving her prostitute problems so she can be a magic mirror for the sex slaves.

Let’s talk for a second about Ali’s views on oral sex. As far as men going down on her goes, she says there’s nothing that makes her feel more powerful than a white man going down on her. She says she can just feel the entitlement and privilege being soaked back up into her. This is straight up racist, as she is much of the time. Being racist is another prostitute problem, but we won’t get into the many instances of Ali Wong being racist. In her marriage, she says she “shoves [her husand’s] head down there” until he comes out wrinkly. As far as giving men head goes, she says she’d much rather have her face cummed on, because it’s easier. She says there’s so much performing and pretending when you suck dick and that lying about how much you like it makes the men cum faster and “will set you free”. She mentions doing the pepper grinder to someone’s penis. I don’t understand this. Do guys really want their dick twisted? Ali also says that she just doesn’t give head anymore. After having a baby, she feels like she doesn’t have to. If her husband demanded she give him a blowjob, she says she would laugh in his face because they are handcuffed together by marriage, a baby, and a mortgage. “Checkmate, bitch: it’s over. You ain’t got nowhere to run” Ali says about this situation. Then she goes on to reveal that she and her husband don’t even have sex anymore, they just “jack off next to each other while fantasizing about Puerto Rican people”. Sex should be a joy, to give and receive. It is a sacred gift and should be a lifelong cultivation. Ali’s views on sex are the twisted programming of old men trying to keep women down.

Now let’s look at Ali’s views on relationships. First of all, before she got married, she dated “losers”, like skater boys. She says that “when a woman sleeps with a man right away, it’s not because she doesn’t respect herself, it’s because she doesn’t respect [the man].” She knows she doesn’t want to marry him, and she just wants to fuck him for fun and then he can “be on his merry way”. Now, not only is the how bad men treat women, it is not respectful of the holy union that is sex. Sex is a meshing of souls, and when you mesh with someone, that person’s energy stays with you forever. So respect sex, because not everyone is free to have sex with whomever they like. Like the sex slaves. Sex is a privledge, even though it should be a right.

When Ali did find someone she “respected” and wanted to marry, he went to Carnegie Mellon, Harvard Business School, and was a Fulbright scholar. She waited until the 5^th date to kiss him. She pressured him to propose, telling him everyone wanted her pussy (then she says in an aside, that no one wanted her pussy). She says all women do this, first passively then aggressively. They threaten to leave if not proposed to, even though it will be hard to start the “manipulation cycle” over again on a new guy. Ali says ALL women nag men until they get weak and cave in and ask the women to marry them. So romantic, right? Scary is more like it. In Don Wong, Ali says that “all women are very good at being extremely unpleasant and holding [their men’s] happiness and self-esteem hostage until they get what [they] fucking deserve.” She calls this a superpower. As if all women had to do this. As if this were the only way to get what we deserve. She says that she “berates her husband for survival. Without him [she feels like she is] fucked. So [she] chips away at his self-esteem on a daily basis to keep him down so that he doesn’t believe he’s worthy of another woman’s affection and leave [her]. [She] keeps him around by keeping him down.” This sounds a bit like I imagine a prostitute would treat a man, doesn’t it? If you’re not convinced, keep reading. 

Ali says that she “doesn’t feed [her husband] out of the goodness of [her] heart, [she does] it out of concern for [her] financial future” and to keep him dependent on her. She says she “trapped [her husband] for his earning potential, and when [she] said I do, [she] meant I’m done.” She goes on to say that she doesn’t want to work anymore: instead of leaning in, she wants to lie down. “Collect checks in her pajamas”. She says feminism is “terrible”, saying that women had it perfect, no job, considered too stupid to have any real responsibility. Then some women had to “show off” and say that we can do anything. To this she says “Bitch, shut up!” When she sees a married woman, she doesn’t see a housewife, she sees a retiree. Ali says she doesn’t just want “equal pay. She wants equal pleasure. But it would be very threatening if all women wanted and felt that they deserved that because then a bunch of women wouldn’t be available to helping their husband’s lives be as easy as possible”. As if the two are mutually exclusive. As if it makes her unhappy, does not give her pleasure, to help her husband. As if women feeling pleasure somehow interferes with their husbands’ lives. This is sick shit, my friends, and very indicative of modern brainwashing.

Later in her career, Ali says that she thinks about cheating on her husband “every 5 minutes” and that she doesn’t want to wait until he’s dead, she wants to “fuck other people now”. At the same time, she says that he “gives her permission to be herself”. Which is it? This is cognitive dissonance. She also says that women who have money, power, and respect, their dating pool vanishes as they gain those things, while it seems to give men a license to cheat. And yet, she implies that because she pays for everything, she can turn her husband into a figurative cuckhold on stage. She says he’s too busy living the life she wanted for herself to care. She says she’s leaning in, while he’s lying down. This is the irony of her life. She signed a prenup, because her husband’s family thought he was going to out-earn her, and she agreed because she agreed. This lit a fire under her ass, she became famous and wealthy, had his children, bought him a house, and now she’s basically miserable. Except that she either pretends she’s not, or she’s lying to herself that she’s not because at the end of it all, she says that in an argument with her husband when she raises her voice, he says you don’t talk to me like that, and then she wants to suck his dick. “[He] puts [her] in her place again, then [he] gives [her] permission to be [herself], and then [he] tells [her] what to do, and then [he] celebrates [her] and that is a healthy marriage” she says. What the fuck? When he puts her in her place, she wants to pleasure him. That’s super sex slave shit right there. Also, what is her place? Under him? Submissive to him? I guess so because after he gives her permission to be herself (as if any of us needed permission), he tells her what to do. Then he celebrates her, as if he were celebrating her doing what he says. This is all cognitive dissonance and not a healthy marriage. You can tell because Ali and her husband filed for divorce very soon after Don Wong, where she repeatedly said she wants to cheat on him.

Let’s review Ali’s views on motherhood. First, she says it’s the ultimate trap. “Boom! A baby comes out and he gotta stay. [She] won”. So to her, a baby is basically just insurance in her “marriage”. She goes on to say that she is on the “verge of putting [her] baby girl in the trash”, she must remind herself “that child abuse is illegal” and she calls the baby a “freeloader”. At one point she just screams “Fuck the baby!” Here’s what she says about being a mom: “That shit is relentless. It’s a wack ass job. You’re in solitary confinement, with no coworkers and a human tomagachi.” She says the more glitter the better: moms need sparkle “to compensate for the light inside of [them] that has died.” She complains about having to sniff her baby’s ass 26 times a day. Now 26 is the number of the couple (2) and sex (6). This is cognitive dissonance: she must view this shit-smelling as sex. Which means she thinks sex is shameful (because shit is a symbol of shame). She mentions eating a cold quesadilla her daughter threw on the floor. Now a quesadilla is a symbol of a vagina and if it's cold that means its unsexy. So basically, she’s taking on her daughter’s unsexy vagina symbol and internalizing it. All this is bad programming. When asked who was taking care of her kid, she says the TV is taking care of her baby. Yikes. These are all prostitute problems with cognitive dissonance as a side dish.

Let’s finish with analyzing Ali Dawn Wong’s name in terms of letters and their Rune counterparts. First we have A, which is a basic phallus, or penis. It’s rudimentary, but the top of a triangle is symbolically the tip of a dick. So we have that. Then we have the letter L. L is the letter of feminine sexuality. Then we have the I. I is the letter of ice and brings things to a complete stop: it essentially freezes everything around it. So we have a dick, female sexuality, and ice. Sounds about right, right? Onward. 

D is a feminine letter as well, with a hard line running up the left, or feminine side. It’s also the letter of the rapid illumination of dismal circumstances and of new beginnings. A is a phallus as we’ve already discovered. Now W is the Rune of sexual joy and communal pleasure. Now N is a terrible letter. It signifies Need, or deep, desperate neediness. It’s like a gaping hole in your soul. So, we have D- femininity, A-masculinity, W-pleasure, and N-need. This also sounds about right for Ms. Wong. Now lets get to her last name, Wong. W as we’ve already seen is pleasure. Now O is basically a rudimentary vagina, just a hole. It’s also the Rune of the homeland and family and immovable wealth, such as land. Next is N which we just discussed as deep, desperate need. Now we have G, a rather complicated letter. It is essentially a Freemason letter. Why, you ask? Besides the fact that it appears on their crest, I’ll tell you why. 

Let’s start with the foundation of the letter G, the C. Now C is a letter that represents the whole world and everything in it. So we have a place: the world. Now we need a time. In a proper G, the letter T is attached to the lower part of the C. So what is T all about? As far as Runes go, it is the Rune of the warrior and the sky God Tyr. But it’s also a symbol of the top of the wheel of the year, or the Summer Solstice. If you can imagine a wheel with an equal arm cross at the center, the top of the wheel, that looks like this: T, represents the summer solstice in the Freemason tradition. In the witch tradition the top of the wheel of the year is the winter solstice. Now why does this matter? It has to do with what goes down on the solstice. The summer solstice is a celebration of the Sun maxing out at its full potential. It is the longest day of the year, and therefore the day of most Sun. Now the Sun is the masculine planet, and the Freemasons worship it because they’re all men. So the letter G represents the Earth on the day of the summer solstice, or the Earth with men in power. It’s sick and sad and that is the final letter in Ali Dawn Wong’s name. So we have the W-pleasure, O-vagina, N-need, G-men rule. This makes sense to me. How about you?

 

Now let’s talk about Ali Wong’s birthday. 4.19.1982. So we have the 4, of the number of the home and stability. Then we have the 19, or the number of the individual triumph. Because the 1 is the individual and the 9 is the resolution (or orgasm) it represents a person bringing about their own resolution. So it’s a number of personal triumph. Then another 19. When you have two numbers that are the same back to back it expresses both the light and the dark side of the number. So Ali Wong brings about personal triumph in the light as well as in the shadow, like how she signed a prenup but became more wealthy than her husband. Or how she got married, had kids and has a career but she’s still unsatisfied. Next we have 82. Now 8 is the number of power and money and the 2 is the number of relationship and the couple. This makes sense since Ali’s self-proclaimed goal in life was to be a trophy wife.

Let’s also take a minute to look at what Ali wears during her stand-up comedy. Her glasses are red, the color of masculinity and sex. In Baby Cobra her shoes are either red (sex), or pink (the prostitute). She wears a lot of animal print which is traditionally sexual and animalistic. In her last show, Don Wong, she wears shoes with black and white checkers. This is typically a Freemason symbol. They put black and white square tiles on the floors of their temples. And feet are, of course, sexual. They’re part of the root chakra, and they form the foundation of the body, much like our sexuality is the foundation of our lives. Plus, foot fetishes anyone? Feet are sexual, believe me. 

So, Ali Wong wearing black and white squares on her feet is like saying she has Freemason sexuality, which is what I am trying to say overall. Ali Wong’s sexuality is governed by the brainwashing of the Freemasons, a bunch of old men who use ancient magic from all the worlds' traditions to rule the world in the shadows. It’s gross and you can’t really blame Ali for this any more than you can blame a fish for breathing water. It’s the environment we live in, but now maybe you can recognize it and avoid your own prostitute problems and the ensuing cognitive dissonance. I hope for your sake that you can. Blessed be.